Jumping

We have been jumping, and she's going amazingly.

We started out over tiny cross rails and poles on the ground. Anything higher and a strange nervousness came over me - I've never been worried about jumping before (not that I've jumped super high, but anyway) but for some reason I just felt nervous and she started cat leaping over tiny jumps and it just wasn't working for us.

So I painted the poles. I cantered over a single pole on the ground and trotted over tiny cross rails until Hayley (the girl part leasing Allie) came to ride her and she kept asking for more height. And you know what? With Hayley's confidence, Allie was all like "I got this".

Hayley and Allie finishing a bounce.

It proved to me that she's perfectly capable of jumping smaller jumps a d that I just needed to throw away my worries and enjoy the ride.

So that's what I've been doing - and we are regularly jumping up to 75cm at home, and the canter is beginning to really improve and have bounce in it. I'm starting to be able to adjust strides to the point where I can tell if she's thinking about taking a long spot and can half halt and bring her forehand up a bit and pop another short stride in before the jump. She turns like a dream (THANK YOU Linda's training!) and will even pop in the occasional auto change. She's super light in the mouth and feels like butter to ride once she's all warmed up. I love it. She seems to love it.

Oh boy oh boy I'm so excited, you have no idea. I'm not just a passenger pointing a horse at a jump and then letting the horse do what he will. I'm part of the success going over the fence. Allie has a beautiful bascule if I get the approach right, and I feel like punching the air after the perfect jump.

I know this is basic simple stuff but it's the beginning. We are on our way!!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas, happy holidays, whatever you celebrate, I'm wishing you a good one!

This year was tough. The toughest year I think I've ever lived through, thanks to this little cherub. Tough, but good.

Eat lots, drink almost too much, and hug your loved ones.

<3

Trimmers Diary

It's 4.47. That's 17 minutes you've been trying to catch your horse. Oh, no, that's fine! Just turn up the minute your appointment starts so that your horse picks up on your rushy-rushy mood and decided he doesn't want a part of that, thank-you-very-much. I've got all the time in the world.

Also, yay for muddy feet, muddy legs, muddy bellies. Big heavy wet canvas rugs left on to drip all over me are fun too.

Oh, your horse doesn't know how to stand up? And he likes to lean and kick and bite? Thanks for telling me that BEFORE I started trimming.

>:-@

Motivation

The last three or so weeks I've been super motivated when it comes to Allie and our goals together.

I've done a bunch of stuff:

- I went to the saddlery and put show stuff on layby - bridle, tall boots, saddle cloth, that sort of thing.
- I've kept her in work 5 days a week for the last three weeks. This has been no small feat and my poor baby has gotten a bit of Peppa Pig screen time while she waits for me to finish schooling.
- We have even been off-property 3 times in the last two weeks!
- I bought 10 poles and I've painted them. I also dug out my old cavaletti/jump wings. Since I've brought them to the paddock we have had a few jump schools and I have to say we are doing better than I expected.

- I finally cleaned the float. That thing was a mess of cobwebs. So glad it's done.
- I've started organising jumping lessons. I've given up on the idea of sending her away to someone to start her. I'm going to do it, under supervision from a coach.
- I've organised a part lease on her. I can't keep her in work 5 or 6 days a week all year around, especially with uni and work starting up in February. The girl is 14 years old and is quite a good rider. She has had a couple of rides on Allie now and they get along really well. I'm hopeful that the pair will be able to go to a few shows and lessons together in exchange for keeping her in work for me 2-3 days a week.

Today, was her first time through a little grid. This video was from when we were done, she was starting to get tired. But she tried so hard for me anyway.

I'm thinking of aiming for newcomers at Equestriad in April, after a couple of training days early in the year. Then probably SIEC in July.

I AM going to make this happen, I am I am I am.

Knee High

Someone's been enjoying some knee-high grass.

Catch up points

Ok ok sorry. I really have been crazy super busy.

I've been doing uni, baby-ing, trying to ride, trying to sleep, trying trying trying.

I'm currently stuck in my driveway in the idling car while Evie naps after refusing to sleep for a whopping 5 hours. I am NOT moving her now.

Anyway, points:

- We took Allie to the vet to have her fetlock seen to. Vet was sure it was just a small infection so sent me home with some bute and antibiotics and it went away within a couple of days.

Thank f*$k. I really don't have any emotional energy left to spend on that horse, as awful as that sounds. I need to get some back from her first, I really do. Get what I mean?

- Since then, I've been doing a little schooling, a little riding out. We took the mares to the indoor arena and that went well.

- We've moved them to a paddock up the back where there is grass too and they seem to be happy. Tonight is their first night in the grass paddock overnight. Trying to wean them onto the grass slowly.

- We even rode them up to the new yard bareback today, as it's a bit of a hike from down the front. They were angels. God love them.

- In other news, I've lost all confidence over jumps. Even tiny little cross rails. Poor Allie can tell I won't commit and I take my leg off and she just won't do it if my heart isn't in it. So I'm hoping some lessons over fences will fix that, but it's the organising and the affording and the time for said lessons that's holding me back. It's so easy to fall into the habit of doing nothing each day, especially with a clingy cranky kid that won't let me walk 3 steps away from her at the moment. Sigh.

- I've been trimming a bit, loving it. Evie is normally happy to watch if I'm quick and she has a cartoon to watch, or if I have a helper to distract her.

- I've had a few inquiries about glue on shoes so I thought I had better practice again as I haven't put on a set since I was first pregnant. So Allie got her first set of shoes. They seem ok so far, she only took a couple of days to get used to them. I think she has a different elbow action in them than she normally does. She's super sound barefoot and doesn't need them, I've only put them on for practice. The glueing process gets easier each time.

Ffs

We've been riding weekly, Allie has been really good, like, amazing, to ride.

We have her feet in gear, all systems are go to plod along.

Then, yesterday, attack of the fat leg.

SIGH

Right hind fetlock, doesn't look lame to me, but she seems uncomfortable when flexing it.

It was worse this morning, so off to the vet tomorrow. Wish me luck.

All We Need

All we need is the pony!

Little Ideas

So I've ridden a few times since the clinic. My horse is feeling awesome - I feel like our big break from riding and being partners didn't even happen. It's like she's matured and grown up some how over the last couple of years.

She looks very different to how she used to look. I use timehop (an app that brings up social media posts and photos from this date in the past) and some old pics of her popped up the other day and it just struck me how different she is. Even just 3 years ago she looked like a rangy young thing compared to now, and she was in full work then, too.

Our first lesson with Ann about 3 years ago. LOL

Als just before I had Evie, so maybe about 6 months ago? In no work and looking FINE.

She could totally smash a prelim test right now I think, if I had a dressage saddle that fit her and if I had white jods and a jacket that fit me and if my tall boots weren't trashed and if I could get her there with a car that didn't have a gearbox that was about to blow up and if I had a current EFA membership and I could fix all this if I was working at the moment. But my whoops baby kinda put a stop to the whole making money thing so what do you do in this situation?

You dream. Ah well.

But maybe, just maybe... My dad is retiring and he is giving each of his daughters a little bit of money so maybe I can fix the truck and buy the clothes and boots and membership and fit the saddle with that?

Maybe. I hope so! Would love to get her to a comp in the next 6 months or so.

I did some horsey shit.

No, really, I did!!

No photos so this is going to be really boring but Linda ran her very first clinic and I attended. It was awesome.

We ran through some basic exercises, like "stop your feet, give me your head" (or one rein stop), which is where you hold the reins on the buckle, then lift one hand straight up and take the rein with the other hand by sliding halfway down, and bringing your hand to your hip. Then, waiting until the horses are stops moving her feet and gives you the rein, then just drop the rein.

We also yielded hindquarters, played with side passing, rein back, that kinda thing. Then, in the afternoon, she set up a working equitation course and we played around with all the different phases and then out it all together. There was slalem poles, small jumps, poles making an L shape to rein back through (around the corner), poles to six pass over, a very small clover leaf barrels pattern, and a big giant tarp to trot over.

Oh man, I had so much fun.

My husband had Evie all day but she won't take a bottle so the poor bloke had to drive her to me every 3 hours for a feed, but he said it wasn't too much if a pain in the arse. So I was able to concentrate and enjoy the day.

Allie was a gem. Linda has done all the basic exersices with her before, a couple of years ago when I had Allie in training with her. So it was a bit of a refresher course for her, and I got a lot out of it because if that. The only thing was Als would get a bit frazzled if I asked for too much at once. So the rein back was one step at a time, as was the side pass. She was great with the one rein stop, we did it from walk, trot and even canter!

I didn't manage to ride again until today, a whole week later. But she was good (even though I today in the dark). She remembered it all and I can't wait to get on again.

So, I've been very quiet here. I guess it's because this is a horse blog and I've not been doing much more than feeding the damn things. Being a mum to a tiny baby is hard you guys.

But Evie is starting to go longer between feeds. She is very happy being looked after by her dad, so I'm slowly starting to go do more stuff by myself. It is really helping my mental state.

I've tried riding a couple of times but Allie needed/needs so much stuff done to get her right, before she can officially start back in work again. The shopping list:
- Vaccinations
- Teeth
- Body clip (way too hairy and itchy)
- Body work (massage etc)
- Feet trimmed, lucky I know a good trimmer ;)
- Saddles fitted and billets changed on dressage saddle

Of course, hooves were easier than most, I just needed hubby to look after Evie while I did them. Then I had the EMT out for a massage - she's feeling pretty good over all, just slightly tight in the hind quarter. The EMT and I agreed that the jump saddle fits well right now but that the dressage does not. So I'm riding in the jump until next month when we can afford to have the dressage altered and billets done. That works!

My float needed a new loom because we lost blinkers and electric brakes. So that finally got fixed, and we took the horses to the vet to be vaccinated and clipped (and Allie's teeth). The trip over was super eventful, with Gracie not traveling well at all and a bloody truck riding up my arse and holding his horn down honking straight into the float and terrifying the horses again and again to the point where I stopped and got out of the car and had it out with him on the side of the road. I was fucking furious. He didn't give a shit though. Ugh I hate other drivers when I'm towing.

ANYWAY they both got clipped. Even the groomer kept going on and on about how much better Allie looked with a clip! She seriously looked like an unkempt yak (see comparison below). And she feels awful with all that hair, she's too hairy for Aussie winters. It's been pretty mild this year so she's been super itchy from sweating.

So with teeth, body, hooves and coat all done and a saddle that fits, yesterday we went for a fang around the property. She was a lunatic, had so much energy. She started the stupid threatening to rear bullshit again (I guess that happens when you aren't schooled for almost 3 years) so I wore my vest and got stuck into her and made her move FORWARD. And it worked.

We ended up bowling along the gravel drives (it's so wet that we can't ride anywhere else really) and along a high well drained ridge in a big balanced forward canter with me up in two point and her feeling the awesomeness that is her body and she could breathe fine (!!!!!) and I felt like the last 3 years of setbacks didn't matter and it was just my horse and I and and and and yeah. All that good stuff. It was fricking fantastic!!

Next up is saddle fitter, then hopefully we can figure out a way to get to the indoor to school on some footing that doesn't threaten to trip my horse.

Finally!

I rode!!! It felt like I never stopped. She was so willing, so happy to do what I asked. It was really wet so we just did a bit of walk and trot in her yard.

Gosh I love this horse!

Have some borning video (you can hear Evie chatting to Natalie. Naw!):

Question

I've got Casey here visiting at the moment and we are wondering if you can buy vaccines over the counter (even from saddlerys) where you are to give to your horses?

Here in Oz we can get tetanus and strangles vaccines from the saddlery and we just realised that this situation may be a little weird. Input please!!

The Little Things

We had a poosplosion today (not the first). Digging through the drawer trying to fond something to put on her, I found this (the onsie below) - the first piece of clothing anyone bought for my baby. A girl at work, Stacey, bought it for me when I first got pregnant and I was feeling sad about missing out on another almost year of riding.

It really meant a lot to me that she bought this for me. And now it's on my kiddo and I'm super happy.

We fed up the horses together by ourselves for the fist time this morning. She only cried for half of it. Little cheeky. She doesn't like the pram if it's not moving.

<3

Learning and Waiting

Evie is 16 days old today. I've mostly just been learning how to be a mum.

It's funny how when we go on walks I am on the lookout for hazards. I would throw myself in front of a bus for her.

She's doing really well. Sleeps fairly well, settles fairly easily. Breastfeeds like a champ (go my boobies!! At least they work right!). She's covered in baby acne at the moment though, poor child.

We have started doing feedups again. Allie is fat and getting hairy and is in dire need of a wash with some quit itch as she is scrubbing her mane and tail out. :(

I'm really looking forward to being able yo ride again when Evie is 6 weeks. Linda offered to put 2 weeks under saddle on Allie for me (as a baby present LOL) before I get on her again. I'll take her up on it, for sure. Allie needs it and it will be nice to get back onto a semi-schooled horse. :)

That's about it really!

Pony Visit

We went to visit Allie today. She desperately needs her feet done (Nat is doing them on Thursday). Her dark winter coat is starting to come through. She has been scratching again so her tail is scrubbed out. :(

She needs a wash, and some work and some loving. But she looks awesome weight wise and her nostril smelled fine and only had a few crusties.

I caught her, brought her out and brushed her. Picked her feet, brushed out her mane and tail. I let her have a pick of green clover and then we popped her away.

It was amazing. I'm so happy.

Evie

You guys. I have a daughter.

And she's just a perfect little creature.

I can't WAIT to buy her a stout 14hh Welsh pony (big enough for mum to ride too, yeah? Welshies are the BOMB).

She has my eyes. They're big and almond shaped and the iris takes up more room than normal. It kinda hit me last night - I was looking in the mirror at myself and recognised her eyes in mine. What a moment. <3

Because I had her via c-sec, I haven't been back out to see Allie at all. I'm not allowed to drive at the moment, and our first full day at home was only yesterday. Still figuring out a lot of stuff so I've given myself time to just chill out with my daughter before we go out to the paddock. I'm not in too much pain at least.

Allie is being taken care of by Natalie. Gosh I miss her so much though. Hopefully we get out there for pats and cuddles this weekend or early next week. I'm dissapointed that I had to have a c-sec (mostly now just because in have to wait so long for full recovery i.e. finally riding my horse again) but it is just another little hurdle to hop over before we restart our journey together again. Not long now, Allie.

Now, shall I spam you with baby photos?

Finally!

So I finally had my baby!

Last night (9th March), Evelyn was born at 11.09pm, weighing 4130g, via cesarean section, after a long wait trying to prepare my body for labour that just didn't work.

I'm happy - we have our little daughter! She's chubby, and adorable, and hairy like her dad. She has his feet and his colouring. She has my middle name, Narvelle. Her eyes seem to be blue at the moment.

And I'm in love.

Still Pregnant.

Life just keeps trundling along. Pregnancy is getting harder and harder and harder by the hour. I'm 39 weeks and 3 days today. Due next Thursday.

I don't get up to much these days. Generally, I drag myself out of bed, drive to feed the horses, come home and nap all day on the lounge with the cats and the dog until Andrew gets home and then we have dinner and I attempt to sleep in my bed (which doesn't really work much).

Allie is doing OK on the herbs. Her nose seems less gunky but it is still smelly from the last infection. I'm giving these herbs time to work - really what else can I do? At least she is eating everything (with about 50mL of molasses a day to help).

Natalie rode Allie last weekend. Allie was really good for her - tried really hard. There was no coughing (yay!) and while unfit, she didn't have any issues breathing. You can tell the horse wants more interaction, seems to want a job to do. I'll pop a couple of photos at the end of this post.

Other than that, I'm just preparing mentally for this kid to finally come along, preparing to finally get my body back (at least partially). I'm trying not to think about the big Bowker hoof conference going on at this very moment in Mt Bulla where I am desperate to be, with all my hoof nerd friends talking about feet and learning all about the latest and greatest research and findings. And I'm trying not to feel guilty about missing out on that stuff.

Hopefully next update with have squishy baby photos. We can only hope.

Alternative

So.

I am not happy with how often poor Allie has sinus infections. I also do not want to put her through more surgery to remove the extensive scar tissue that is causing most of these infections.

I think that, after 17 months of lameness, stall rest, in and out of hospital, surgery, etc etc, her immune system is shot. It needs help.

I've turned to McDowell's Herbs in Bathurst to help. They've sent me a specialised tincture for her sinus, a tendon and bone mix, colloidal silver, slippery elm and chamomile. This has cost an absolute bomb, but if it gets her to where she isn't suffering from a runny nose or enlarged lymph node every 2 or 3 weeks, then it is all worth it. She's starting today - doesn't seem to notice that there are extra things in her feed, otherwise I would have to paste her twice a day, which she is totally totally sick of.

So, I have to call McDowell's back in 3 weeks to report how she is doing.

Wish us luck!

This Stunning Creature

I am super biased.

That tail is finally recovering from Tail-Eating-Fence-2012

I think my horse is just the most beautiful creature on the planet. In reality, she is just a ncely put together pretty faced bay mare.

Nothing like a clean popo with a fresh trim and a banged tail!

But I could stare at that horse all day long. Every day when I get to the paddock, I look at my horse and just think wow. I am so lucky to have a horse like that!

Yes, I am rather lovey, aren't I?

Today, I spent a couple of hours waddling around the paddock doing a couple of chores. After I fed them breakfast, I got down on my hands and knees and scrubbed one of Allie's cotton combo rugs clean, hung it on the fence, then got Allie out and washed her. I scrubbed her mane and tail (which she LOVES), and conditioned them both with a protien conditioner. I washed her face (which she was not so pleased about). I sprayed detangler in her tail and combed it out. I even trimmed her tail AND did a hack job of trimming her mane.

She keeps rubbing out the centre of her mane. I think she has found a favorite rubbing spot.

Then, after a green pick to dry off, I popped her back in her yard, made her run around a bit to try to get some video (which uploaded to Youtube sideways?), then rugged her up again to help stop her scrubbing her mane and tail out.

Her scar is looking excellent!

It was awesome just to spend an hour or so pottering around with my pony again, :)

Pregnancy Crap

Had another scan to rule out the blood vessel issue - 100% we do NOT have a blood vessel issue. All is good to go for normal delivery!

In other (related) news, it's my last day at work tomorrow before o go on maternity leave. I'm totally looking forward to napping all day until the bub comes.

If the weather stays mild, I may even go look at/brush my horse! How novel!

Update on The Vessel Issue

Had my doctor appointment today at the hospital. Despite having a 10.45am appointment, I didn't see the doctor until 12.30!!

She looked at my scan and the results and she really put my fears to rest. Apparently they all look like maternal vessels, as they seem to be surrounded by muscle, not just clinging lightly to the membranes (like they would if they were baby's vessels). She assured me that the scan next week is just to double check, which they always do in these types of cases. She doesn't think it's vasa previa (the scary baby-bleeds-out-in-4-minutes thing) but just some random maternal vessels that I've grown for some reason or another.

THIS IS AWESOME NEWS.

Not only that, but if all comes back clear at the next scan, they'll let me go naturally. Even if they are the maternal vessels we think they are, I wouldn't bleed that much apparently so vaginal birth is perfectly safe.

I'm super happy.

Thanks guys for your comments and concern. I was rather scared!

In other news, I miss this horse so.much. even though I see her every day, it's just not the same.

Completely Baby Related

If you're uninterested in baby stuff, skip this one. I won't blame you!

I'm 34 weeks, 2 days today. At 18 weeks, I had a scan and they noted that I had a low lying placenta (only 1cm away from my cervix) which, if it didn't move, would block the way for bub to come out and would be too dangerous for a vaginal birth. So, they booked me in for another scan at or around 34 weeks to check to see if the placenta moved up as the uterus grew bigger.

I had that scan last Tuesday and the good news was that my placenta is now 5cm away from my cervix! Plenty of room apparently. However, while I was having the yucky internal scan, the sonographer started using colour doppler to look at some blood vessels that were randomly near the cervix - only 1.5cm away. She hummed and hawed and tried to get a heartbeat from them (to see if they were my blood vessels going into placenta or if they were Bub's vessels going from the placenta to bub). Bub's head was RIGHT up against my cervix, and s/he is a super active kid so she spent about a half hour trying but not able to get a clear reading on any of the blood vessels because kiddo kept head-butting the area and ruining it.

She took out the probe and told me to relax a minute while she went and got a doctor as she wasn't sure what was going on with these random blood vessels.

A doctor returned with her and they did another internal, same as before, trying to get readings on the vessels, poking and prodding my lower abdomen to try to get the baby to move away from the cervix, to no avail. Stubborn kid.

They didn't really talk to me but I heard them discussing. I heard "I think they're maternal", "too close to cervix", "can't tell, maybe just placental lakes?", " many vessels"... Blah blah blah. They removed the prove again and the doctor (who seemed to be a bit of a newbie) told me that they aren't sure what the vessels are, nor who they belong to. She said another scan at 36 weeks was needed, and that if they couldn't tell what was going on then (again), that there was a possibility I would need an MRI to map the vessels! She also mentioned that if they are baby's vessels, that it would be too dangerous to allow a vaginal birth and that a cesarean may be a possibility.

I left, but they didn't give me the scan results (that I needed to take to the birth unit after the scan to book a cesarean if my placenta hadn't moved) so Andrew and I went home, a bit confused and disappointed that there seemed to be another complication.

Now, I know LOTS of people have cesareans. I know they save lives. But I was/am looking forward to labour and giving birth naturally to my child and experiencing that whole thing. I know, crazy talk. Also, I'M FUCKING TERRIFIED OF HAVING MAJOR ABDOMINAL SURGERY WHILE AWAKE BUT TRAPPED ON A BED. Ahem.

So that night, I got all cranky and teary and sad about the birth I felt I was loosing, and being scared of surgery, and upset about the long drawn out recovery, AND also the even longer wait to get back in the saddle. Andrew copped my random abuse about silly things and then just held me and talked me through everything. He is an absolute gem, that man.

The next day, the birth unit called me. She said that she saw in the book that they were expecting me yesterday (I didn't have an appointment though) and that they hadn't seen me. I jumped in, explaining the weird scan and how they hadn't given me any results and how I am going back at 36 weeks. She then surprised me when said that she had my results with her (ultrasound, midwife program and birth unit are all at the same hospital), and that she had just spoken to the team of doctors on my case (eh? I've only been seeing midwives as it's been a low risk pregnancy), and that the doctors want to meet with me as soon as possible. She asked me to call their office as soon as I got off the phone and to book in to see Dr Rizvi (I think she's the head doctor?) as soon as they could book me in after she got back from annual leave. I was a bit shocked - why would they want to see me before my next scan? Anyway, I am booked in to see her on Tuesday next week, which was the earliest available apparently.

So that whole "meeting with the doctors" thing got me panicking a little bit. So I googled "blood vessels close to cervix pregnancy" and whoah boy why did I do that?!?

I couldn't find anything on maternal vessels near the cervix, but there is plenty of scary fucking shit on fetal blood vessels near the cervix. It's called Vasa Previa (meaning vessels in the way of the baby) and if that is what I have got, it seems that if my membranes break, the blood vessels are extremely prone to breaking and baby can bleed out and die within 4-5 minutes. It's rare, one stat I saw was something like 1:3000 pregnancies. It's not often diagnosed before labour, and fetal death rates when not diagnosed pre-labour are something like 98%. The only safe option is early cesarean before the mother has a chance to go into labour. Risk factors include low lying placenta. So yeah. Ugh.

But most sources said (I used my uni's account with Google Scholar to read studies on the condition, more reliable, scientific, not as emotive language, less scary research tbh) that when diagnosed at antenatal scans, that survival rates are over 97%. Also, most mothers diagnosed with this are hospitalised as soon as possible.

So what is it I have? Do I have a serious fatal condition and if I go into labour my baby will die and I should be hospitalised now? Or do they really not know what this is and there's little risk at this point and I can just keep doing my thing and attending scans and appointments etc? I keep lying awake at night stressing about it and trying not to google more. I have given up any hope of a vaginal birth and have stopped being so terrified of a cesarean because the alternative is unthinkable. I'm super worried and scared and just needed to write this all out here. I know it's not horse related, but this is the only blog I have for now.

So yeah. That's where we are at at the moment. I've probably (hopefully) way overreacted but this is what I do when medical people don't give me answers. I go looking myself.

I don't know how to end this entry now. Hrm.

FIN.

Facebook Funnny

One of my FB friends posted this.

I was in fits.

Pony Days

My friend (who lost her beautiful mare earlier this year) has started writing a blog recently. She blogs over at Pony Days and I am loving her style! She is breaking in her young gelding and is into endurance.

If you feel like adding another blog to your feed, I recommend this one!