Metronidazole

Allie has been on the "nastier" antibiotics for a week and a half now. Within 24 hours of the first dose, her nose stopped smelling and the discharge cleared up. We have a week and a half to go.

The poor thing isn't eating her feeds now, though. It can be a side effects of the Metronidazole, or it could be ulcers, who knows. She's still eating hay at least. She's hating being pasted twice a day, absolutely hating it.

I got her out to give her a brush the other day, and she thoroughly enjoyed it. It's been years since she's had a winter coat to lose, because I normally clip her. It was nice to just get my hands on her for a while.

Last night I had to head out to feed after dark. When I got there, she was laying down, sternal, having a snooze. I walked up to her to say hello and she didn't get up. I sat down next to her and she wuffled in my face and pointed to the spots she wanted me to scratch. I ended up snuggling into her side, quietly crying, for about 15 minutes. Just being with her. She was loving the attention. She kept taking big long deep sniffs of me, her chest pushing me up and away, then gently dropping me back again. She particularly wanted scratches on the scar on her face, and her left knee, weirdly. It was a beautiful beautiful moment.

This morning I brought her into Dad's backyard (she's staying at dad's at the moment, with Gracie) as that's the only place with any green pick because his waste water is sprinkled there. As I let her grab mouthfuls of the good stuff, I noticed a big healthy patch of clover.

Now, some of you know but most don't, my super power is that I find four leaf clovers. Like, not just the occasional one here or there, but heaps of them. Point at any clover patch, and I'll find you 5 four leaf clovers within 5 minutes, no problems.

Ok, so with that knowledge, I saw myself making a deal with fate, that I felt was in my favour. "If I find a four leaf clover, then she will survive this". So I started sorting through the clover, trying to find my hope. One minute went past. 3 minutes. 5 minutes. 10 minutes. 25 minutes later and still, nothing. I ended up "cheating", removing all the three leaf clovers from the patch, one by one, madly trying to find one, desperately freaking out because this has never happened to me before. I had to give up because dad's wastewater sprinkler started up and then Allie freaked out, then Evie started calling from the car. I had to give up.

"It's just a stupid made up deal anyway, it doesn't mean anything".

It played on my mind all day. I like to pretend I'm all sciencey and don't believe in bullshit hocus pocus but really I'm a superstitious person.

Returning home this afternoon, I got out of the car and something fell out of my car onto the grass. As I picked it up, I saw it: the world's smallest, mankiest four leaf clover.

Squatting down, I picked it and started to cry again.

"Everything is going to be ok"