Frustrating Pony-Mare.

My horse has a problem.

While she is generally a pretty calm horse, I think she does actually suffer from anxiety otherwise known as 'being a worry wort'. Her anxiety levels stay fairly low in the grand scheme of things but she worries about tiny things - like weather changes or having to go in the stable at night because it is pissing down with rain or freezing cold, or even something as stupid as swapping to the other night yard when they stay out.

In their little herd of two, Allie is the watcher on the wall. Gracie lies out flat in the sun, Allie watches for danger. Gracie grazes to her heart's content - Allie stares off into the distance on surveillance. The sheep herd across the road are on the move? Allie is the first to charge over to the fence and watch them to make sure they don't somehow escape their paddock, cross the road, leap the high fence and get in with my horses. (On a side note, my horse is a moron. She is from Goulburn for christ sake and she is scared of sheep?!?!).

Exhibit A - worry-wort eye...

But she doesn't stall walk much, she doesn't whinny and cry out, she doesn't stand trembling when she is scared. She is an internaliser. When she is stressed, she gets tucked up, a little figity and most frustrating of all, she goes off her feed. Remember when Natalie took her away to camp and she didn't eat her hard feed ALL FRICKEN WEEK? How am I supposed to take her away to shows if she won't eat?

Even with good weight on she gets tucked up - this was because the neighbors had their motor bikes out.

Again with the herring gut...

The latest saga of refusing to eat is a result of being stabled since lunchtime Thursday, then being taken to the clinic, sedated and clipped on Friday. We were home by 10am however she did not eat her dinner from the night before and refused to be even slightly interested in the lunchtime feed I gave her. Or her dinner Friday night, or breakfast Saturday morning. Treats hand fed? She no want. Hay? Mostly eaten but not finished.

Cue fuming Lisa.

HORSE! You need to eat - you are already light on - I need to fatten you up so you look like a proper dressage horse! So you don't freeze in winter now you are clipped! How do I fatten you up if you won't eat your bloody grain feeds?! How do  you get the energy to be ridden if you won't eat?

In desperation (and because it was pissing down all day. again.) yesterday I went to the feed store and bought vitamin B12 to stab her with and Apetite to shove down her throat. I gave her 10ml B12 and 30ml Apetite at about 4pm I think.

A couple hours later she was definitely calmer in the stable - she wasn't hanging her head over the door watching for horse stealing bandits, or madly ripping at her hay like a kookaburra with a snake. She was chilling in the middle of her stall with a soft eye and one hind resting. Huh.

Dinner was served at about 9.30pm. Her (tiny) dinner last night was stripped down to the bare essentials - one scoop each of oaten and lucerne chaff and two metric cups of whole oats. That is it - no water, no supplements, no copra or hygain or weightlifter.

It took all night, but she ate it - every last bit.


NB. I realise that if this continues I should have her put on a course of ulcerguard or something. Could be ulcers but unlikely.

The Plan

Above is our plan for New Years Eve tonight. Specifically, avoiding what happened last year.

This year, the girls will be locked up in their stables (where they have spent the night for the last week), sedated, and out of sight of the fireworks thanks to our nifty blue tarps. They will also have some loud music playing from the radio to help drown out the noise.

We can not go through what we went through last year ever again. This will be my NYE every year for the rest of my life. Overkill? Maybe. But it is not worth the risk. Not one bit.

The neighbours had a couple of fireworks last night (maybe 3?) but they were over very quickly. The girls were already stabled away and they were fine. But that loud booming noise - it makes Nat and I feel like throwing up everywhere. I got physically sick and felt exactly like I did last year when we heard them last night.

Last year when we drove in the driveway and saw the fences down, was the absolute worst moment of my entire life up until that point. Then it just got worse and worse as the night drew on. We stumbled through the spider riddled bush looking for any sign of them. Calling, screaming, hearing hooves and soft neighs in our heads but thinking it was real. I even remember thinking "even if we find them dead, at least I know where they are".

When there was a car accident around the corner from my house about a half hour after we got home that night and I thought the horses caused it - cop cars everywhere and the cop I spoke to couldn't tell me what was going on. I swore I heard screaming horses and I envisioned my girls trapped between a car and a tree. It was really just the cop car radios distorting voices but it was all I could do to stop myself from pushing past them and running to see.

Hours of trudging through the bush, calling to them, praying to God, bargaining to just help us find them. Many many friends coming to help us look, some with their horses, some people I had never even met before, in over 40 degree (104 Fahrenheit) heat, all helping to find our mares.

And then the relief, when I thought all was lost, the relief when Andrew called me in hysterics telling me he had found them and they were safe (albeit cut up, thirsty and hungry).

Never ever ever ever again.

Nothing to report... Again.

Rain, rain and more rain has been the agenda of the week. We rode on Monday after work in the dark and it was nice to be back on my horse agin after the finger injury. Allie has been very fussy in the mouth, so I think a dentist visit is due.

This Friday I am taking both girls to another hoof clinic. I'm trimming Gracie there but I want her to just behave so I am bringing Allie along to keep her sane. I know, that's cheating, but the whole point of the day is for me to trim, and to be safe doing so. So ner.

In all this rain we have been stabling them at night if it storms and my horse will just NOT eat her dinner. She eats all her hay, and now that their feed buckets are wall mounted she doesn't poo in it anymore but she just doesn't eat it. She is too busy hanging her head over the stable door looking into the black nothingness that is my backyard. She will eat it in the morning once she is turned out no problems. :<

Chakra is good. We told the vet that we won't be treating the cancer and just keeping a close eye on her. Right now, she is healthy and happy. I'm ok too. I feel at peace with my decision and I know that it is the right one for us. Keep sending happy puppy thoughts our way though please!

Like I said, not much to report.

The Greener Grass Really is Better!

Here are some photos of the horses at our new place today.

Savanna in the stable. Apparently it's very boring in there.

Allie, me, Sav and Grace in the background.

Allie. You can see my home made blocker tie ring in that I used to tie her up.

Grumpy Gracie.

Super cute Gracie asking for a treat.

So friken cute!

My lane to the four paddocks.

She was a brat today - so grumpy!

So she was banished to the stable to sort herself out.

<3

This is my home made tie ring - I stole the idea from this guy. Very clever!

Helmets, halters, fly veils, whips, all organised!

Bits bits bits!

Devil green eyed horse.

Onto the (blurry) paddock pics -

lol!